值得一看文章翻譯站

給我親愛的12歲兒子:

我的責任就是要體認何時是該教育你的時刻。有時候我的確會漏掉這樣的時刻，不過今天在球場我注意到了。

下次你想要對我翻白眼，想要對這個懷了你九個月、辛苦把11磅8盎司的你生出來的媽媽回嘴一大堆的時候，你要記得:

記得我愛你。

記得醫生幫你縫補傷口的時候我握著你的手。

記得我在你8932場運動活動中，我都有到場幫你加油。

記得我唸了 Goodnight Moon故事書461次給你聽…連續六個月。

記得我假裝沒看到你把豆芽菜都偷餵給狗吃。

記得你學會騎腳踏車的那天，我們多開心的歡呼。結果 McJudgerson太太還要我們小聲一點免得影響她的讀書會，我還回敬她一根不太禮貌的手指。

記得今天。

就在今天，你對我翻白眼，翻超用力的眼睛都快掉出來了。你講話的口氣更是比你說出來的話更糟糕。那口氣跟我自己在青少年時期不耐煩的口氣一模一樣。

當下我回想了許多事情。我講不出話。

當下車上有你的朋友在，我真希望有人可以告訴我我該怎麼做。

我是應該現在跟我兒子講清楚呢?還是應該要等到我們兩個人獨處的時候?

拜託拜託，我不想在他朋友面前殺了自己的小孩。

就在我祈求有答案的時候，我得到了一個徵兆。

收音機開始撥放外國人合唱團的 "I Want to Know What Love Is"。於是我把收音機開到最大聲，我開始跟者一起唱。

我在車子座椅上開始擺動身體、我唱錯歌詞、我讓你跟你朋友看看什麼叫白人女孩的經典舞步。

我假裝我沒有注意到你被嚇壞的臉。我開始擺動我的手在空中，穰後大唱"I got to take a little slime. A little slime to make things grosser!"

在你跟你朋友下車的時候，我叫你回來車窗邊一下。我給了你大大的笑容，對你眨眼，之後說”以後不要再這樣對我說話了。”

真希望你有機會認識你曾祖母。她會講很多南方的話直到今天我都還忘不了。今天，我可以聽到她會說"That will fix your little red wagon."(直譯: 這可以修好你的紅色推車，類似修理到你了吧的感覺)

所以呢…你今天有學到什麼嗎? 千萬不要低估你媽的能力。千萬不要對你媽出言不遜。還有千萬不要對你媽翻白眼，尤其在你朋友面前!

JL碎念:

今天這是一篇比較輕鬆有趣的文章，自己邊翻譯都邊笑出來。

我很喜歡一些西方父母與子女之間的相處模式，互相尊重，彼此感謝，彼此開玩笑之類的。

當然，在小孩忤逆你的時候，情緒大爆發是很直覺的反應，但這個媽媽處理的方式，也算是可以讓我們想想下次小孩對我們大翻白眼的時候，我們還可以怎麼做?

原文在這裡: http://goo.gl/qH2Owc

Dear 12-Year-Old Son of Mine,

It is my job to recognize "teachable moments" in your life. Sometimes, I miss the mark. Today, I knocked it out of the ballpark.

The next time you consider rolling your eyes and smart talking the mother who carried you for nine months and pushed out all 11 pounds and 8 ounces of you, remember this:

Remember that I love you.

Remember that I have held your hand while a doctor stitched you up.

Remember that I have cheered for you at 8,932 sporting events.

Remember that I read Goodnight Moon to you 461 times... every day for six months.

Remember that I pretended not to notice when you fed your brussels sprouts to the dog.

Remember the day that we all cheered wildly when you learned to ride your bike. Know that when Ms. McJudgerson shushed us for ruining the serenity of her book club, as she was walking away -- I gave the finger to her back.

Remember today.

Today -- the day that you eyerolled so hard that your eyeballs almost fell out of your head and the tone in your voice was worse than the words you spoke. I recognized the "duh" tone from my own teenage voice.

I was so taken aback by your behavior that for once, I was speechless.

You had friends in the car and I prayed for guidance.

Should I deal with this in front of his friends or wait until we are alone? Please, don't let me kill my child in front of his friends.

Just as I was praying for answers, I received a sign.

Foreigner's "I Want to Know What Love Is" came on the radio.

Cranking the radio as loud as I could stand, I began to sing. Louder and louder, I sang.

I swayed in my seat. I sang the wrong words. I showed you and your friends my awesome "white girl overbite" move.

I pretended not to notice your horrified face. I waved my hands in the air and sang, "I got to take a little slime. A little slime to make things grosser!"

As I dropped you and your friends off, I called you to my window. I smiled my biggest smile, winked at you and said, "Don't ever talk to me like that again."

I wish you could have known your great-grandmother. She had many southern phrases that still play in my head. Today, I heard her say, "That will fix your little red wagon."

So... what did you learn today? Never underestimate your mother. Never sass talk your mother. And never roll your eyes at your mother -- especially in front of your friends.