這是一個reddit(網站)的故事。一位單親爸爸獨力扶養他13歲的兒子。他在借了兒子的iPad後從兒子的google搜尋項目中發現兒子是gay. 於是這個爸爸上網詢問LGBT社團的網友們要如何可以讓他兒子能感到自在的自己出櫃。他在幾天後ＰＯ上了故事進展。
Amazing story from reddit. A single dad who is raising a 13 year old son learned that his son was gay after borrowing his iPad and seeing his Google searches. He went to a section of reddit for LGBT people and asked how he should make his son feel comfortable enough to come out in his own terms. He posted this update a few days later:
“首先，我想謝謝網友給我的建議，也因為大家這麼熱烈的回應，我覺得我應該要給大家知道現在的狀況如何。就像許多網友的建議作法，先從向兒子暗示我完全不介意有一個同性戀兒子，然後讓他自然的承認自己是同性戀。我覺得這是一個非常好的辦法。
"Firstly, I'd just like to thank all of you who commented and gave me advice on the previous post, and because the post got so much attention I thought it wouldn't be fair for me not to make an update.As many comments suggested that I do, is to slightly hint toward the notion that I am perfectly happy with having a gay son, while letting him do the work in actually saying the words "I'm gay", and I thought that was a very good idea.
一開始我先跟他閒聊一些新聞，例如我談到Tim Cook（蘋果的ＣＥＯ）承認自己是同性戀有多酷，然後我問他覺得怎麼樣。我以為他只會給我一個簡單青少年式的回應，例如：恩 不錯呀之類的。但他卻給了我非常詳盡的回應。我真的很高興因為我們已經很久沒有像這樣的談心了。
I started off with talking about general media with him, for instance I mentioned how awesome it was that Tim Cook (CEO of Apple) came out as being gay and I asked him what he thought about it and I was completely expecting him to give a typical teenager response like "yeah.. its good" or something like that but he actually gave me a detailed response which I absolutely loved because for the first time in a good while I've actually held a conversation with my son that felt really... rewarding.
我也談到我注意到他最近特別開心，也說到那有點被講到爛的話“我不管怎樣都是愛你的，我只希望你開心“。不過這段對話他只有回應我”恩 我知道“。
I also wanted to talk to him about how I've noticed that he's not been acting as cheerful as he usually has and I sort of gave the cliche spiel of "I love you no matter what and I just want to see you be happy" but I didn't get much of a response that time apart from "yeah I know.."
第二天我去學校接他的時候，我決定問他最近有沒有喜歡什麼人，重點是我的講法絕對不提及他喜歡的人是男生還是女生。所以不用"he"或是"she"這樣的字，我都用"they"統稱。以下就是我們的對話。
The next day as I picked him up from school I thought I'd ask him about any crushes he has, and I wanted to make sure I didn't say a gender when I asked him, so instead of 'he' or 'she' I used 'they' etc.. Here is that conversation as I remember it...
我：那你有什麼喜歡的人嗎？
兒子： ㄜ...沒有...ㄜ..可能有
我：喔～所以誰是這幸運的人？
此時他有點困惑的看者我，我不是百分之百肯定他為何困惑，但我覺得可能是因為我說“lucky person”而不是“lucky girl"
Me: So, do you have a crush on anyone?
Son: Uhm... no..m..maybe..
Me: Ohhh so who is the lucky person?
At this point he sort of looked at me slightly confused, I'm not 100% sure why, but I'm assuming it is because I said "lucky person" rather than "lucky girl".
兒子：就有個我法語課班上的人..
我：喔～是喔 所以你喜歡他什麼
兒子：就他的一些事情吧
我：喔 所以像什麼事情？
兒子：我也不知道，就他挺有趣的。
這時候我決定不再繼續談了，但我還是加了一句：不管你喜歡誰，這個人一定很幸運能有你做他的男友。雖然我沒看到，但我很確定他一定對我這句話翻了大白眼。
Son: Just someone from my french class...
Me: Oh yeah... so what do you like about them?
Son: Just.. stuff..
Me: Okay.. but.. like what?
Son: I donno they're just kinda funny I guess...
At this point I dropped the conversation but just before I did I told him "Well, whoever it is, they should be so lucky to have you as a boyfriend.." and while I didn't see it, I certainly felt as though he was rolling his eyes at my cheesy comments.
那天晚餐的時候，我們有幾分鐘沒有講話，餐桌上只聽得到餐具的聲音。我兒子終於開口了，他說：我剛剛在車上本來想跟你說，不過怕說了我們會出車禍。
At the dinner table the same day, while we were eating we had a couple minutes of silence, not much was heard apart from the cutlery and my son finally said "I actually wanted to tell you something in the car, but I was afraid you'd get in an accident.."
我抬起頭看著我他的眼睛，我看得出他在想什麼事情，但我腦裡只能想到“喔天呀！他要跟我說了“
他說：“爸。”之後沈默了幾秒。”我是同性戀“
我看著他忍不住的微笑。我說：“＿＿，你知道我有多愛你吧？”然後我站起身給他一個大大的擁抱。他就在靠者我的肩頭哭了，我也無法克制地留下一些淚。我們之後又再談了一下我有多愛他，不論他愛的是男生還是女生。
I looked up from my plate and looked at him straight in the eyes... I could see he was thinking about something and all I could think of was "OMG this is it..." he said "Dad.." with a couple seconds of silence "..I'm gay". I looked at him and couldn't help myself from smiling, and I told him "____, you know I love you so much... right?" and I got up and gave him a huge hug. He even started to cry on my shoulder and because of that I couldn't help myself but shed a couple tears. We talked for a bit while finishing our dinner about how I can't emphasize enough that I love him regardless of which gender he loves etc...
晚餐後，他做完了作業，我們穿著睡衣躺在沙發上。我看著料理頻道而他在玩他的iPad。我手放在他肩膀而他投靠在我胸前，此刻我只覺得自己是世界上最快樂的爸爸了。
After dinner and after he finished his homework we both lay in our pajamas on the sofa, while I was watching the Cooking Channel and he was playing on his iPad. I had my arm around him and he was leaning his head on my chest, and all I could think of was that I'm the happiest father on earth right now."
這應該是所有小孩出櫃的過程才對。給這位好爸爸大大的讚揚！
This is how it should be for all kids. Kudos to this amazing dad.
ＪＬ碎念：
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