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我的小女兒在幼稚園裡跟你小孩玩在一起、一起游泳、一起在體育課排隊。我的小女兒有HIV，但是法律保障她，法律說我們並不需要告訴你這件事情，除了她的醫生與牙醫，我們並不用告訴學校、夏令營、同班同學、或是任何人。

因為長久以來人們對HIV的漠視與汙名化，有群勇敢的人長期以來努力抗爭未HIV病患爭取免告知他人的權利。我們的認養機構社工就建議我們”完全不要告訴任何人有關她的HIV。這社會上充滿了冷漠與汙辱。你的中國裔小孩本來就已經不好融入這個不同的社群，你有需要讓別人多一個理由更不接受她嗎?”

在幼稚園的時候，我的小女兒告訴你小孩說” Natalie你知道嗎?我血液中有一隻龍。我中國的媽媽在生我的時候傳承給我的。但我持續地吃藥所以這隻龍就一直在沉睡狀態。”Natalie與其他五個小朋友並沒有相信我女兒說的話。事實上，其中一個小朋友說”我也是在中國出生的，我也有一隻龍。”我想這小男孩只是想要融入。我告訴我的小女兒，他們只是尚未懂這一切。

那我到底為什麼不需要告訴學校、教堂或是托育中心呢?因為HIV根本就不會在這些狀況之下傳染。就這麼簡單。現代的醫藥已經可以讓HIV病菌完全不具效力。我的孩子每四個月去做血液檢查，而每次檢查結果都一樣:她血液中完全找不到病毒。她是個健康、快樂、超好笑的女孩。我幫她受傷的膝蓋貼OK蹦、我幫她擦掉鼻血、我跟她吃同份食物、喝水、親親她、還有處理她的鼻屎，這一切根本就並不需要擔心會因此感染HIV。

她只是一個天生就感染到HIV的女孩。如果她的生母有能力在她懷孕的時候吃抗感染的藥，我的小女兒根本就不會有HIV，甚至她根本就不會被人放棄、被人認養。而且你知道嗎?我女兒跟其他HIV患者必須每天吃的藥在中國是免費的。免費!! 中國政府免費提供這些藥給中國HIV的患者。然而大部分的患者卻不願意服藥，因為承認你有HIV等於是向所有你愛的人說再見。你將會被遺棄、你將會被驅逐。人們唯恐不及的要避開你。

JL碎念:

我想大家看到這標題的時候，可能會被嚇到。但看完這篇，是不是安心些。

其實漠視與以訛傳訛真的是太可怕了，就像文章裡說的: HIV isn't scary, but ignorance and stigma are. 我想不只HIV，還有種族的議題，文化的議題其實都是如此。

試者互相了解，是唯一的和平之道。

原文在這裡: http://goo.gl/Cif98b

She has played with your child at a local private preschool, been dunked next to yours during swim lessons, and stands in line behind your kid in gymnastics class. My HIV-positive child has legal protections that mean we don't have to tell you --schools, camps, parents, or anyone except doctors and dentists--about her HIV-positive status.

Because of the ignorance and stigma that's been associated with HIV, brave people have fought hard for the legal right to lie by omission about HIV status. Our social worker pre-adoption advised us: "Tell no one. There is so much stigma and ignorance out there. Already your Chinese child will stick out in your community. Do you really want to give people another reason not to accept her?"

At kindergarten this year, my sweet girl tried to tell your child. "Natalie, guess what? I have a dragon in my blood. I was born with it and my China mommy had it, too. When I take medicine the dragon stays asleep." Natalie, and five other friends, did not believe my daughter. In fact, one told her, "Well, I was born in China and I have a dragon, too!" I guess he felt left out. I explained to her they just didn't know the whole story and couldn't understand. Yet.

So why don't I have to tell schools, churches, and day cares? Because HIV has never been transmitted in these situations, period. Modern medications render the virus powerless. Every four months my child has her blood checked, and every time the results are the same: the sensitive lab tests detect no virus in her bloodstream. She is healthy, happy, and hilarious. I bandage her scraped knees; mop up bloody noses; share food, water, and kisses; and deal with boogies--all with no risk and no worries about contracting HIV.

Look, she just happened to be born with it. If her birth mother had been able to take life-changing antiretroviral drugs while she was pregnant, my daughter would be HIV free. It's possible that she wouldn't even have been relinquished for adoption. Just so you know, those expensive medications that my daughter and other HIV-positive people take every day? They're free in China. Free! The government pays for them. But most Chinese HIV-positive people don't take them, because admitting you are HIV positive means to die to everyone you love. You will be disowned, kicked out. Shunned.

My daughter might date your son when she's a teenager, and she'll marry and have HIV-negative babies one day--if she wants to. Please, fellow mommies, know that HIV is nothing to be afraid of. Please look online, google it, and talk with your pediatrician. Learn and research so that you know the truth, too. You don't have to take my word for it. But just so you know, my HIV-positive kid is playing with your kid, and you have no idea which one she is. And that's okay.

HIV isn't scary, but ignorance and stigma are.